Heroine Training™

live your story | be your own heroine

May Stories: Studio Ghibli, Chilean literature, Braid, & more!

From Broadway Bootcamp videos to webinars to all the interviews I’m recording for Leading Lady, I’ve rediscovered the joy of video-making, and am totally ready to commit to YouTube-ing more regularly. Here’s a new thing I’m trying out, a monthly roundup of my favourite stories this month, from books, films, and games. What do you think?

Thank you for bearing with me during this ongoing Leading Lady launch party!

Here’s what’s been going on:

  • I published the free Broadway Bootcamp mini course (which you can hop onto here!)
  • I co-hosted an awesome webinar with actress Sarah Elizabeth Mitchell on acting and confidence
  • and have another free webinar planned for tomorrow with improv trainer Laura Doorneweerd. Sign up here!

If you’re keen to reclaim your inner confidence and take centre stage in your life, I would love to see you at camp. Registration closes in one week!

Plus, listen to me on some podcasts!

It just so happened that my two favourite personal development podcasts invited me to be a guest this month. Dream. Come. True.

What stories have you enjoyed this month? Let me know!

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P.S. Live Life Like a Video Game: Level Up!

So what have you been up to? ~ The Benefits of Small Talk

So what have you been up to? ~ The Benefits of Small Talk

Let’s talk about small talk. Pleasantries, if you will. In The Sims 3, most Sims will receive a positive mood boost from “being small-talked”. This surprised me – don’t we all hate small talk? But after further thought, I concluded that if you treat typical small talk questions as personal check-ins, those pleasantries can be quite pleasant – and insightful – indeed.

“How are you?”

A meeting with a friend tends to start with some form of “How are you?”. I do a mental scan before answering – how am I doing? 

Okay so maybe the person doesn’t actually care. They are asking because it’s easy, it’s an expectation. Doesn’t stop me from doing that mental check in anyway. How am I?

Because it’s a friend I’m meeting, I won’t revert to the “fine thanks how are you?” In fact, even in small talk, I find it best to reply in a way that gently gets the conversation going. Even a revert to positive weather talk (“I’m really enjoying this patch of sunshine we’re getting!”) is progress. 

“What have you been up to?”

The other question that trips me up when I haven’t been hanging out with people regularly is “What have you been up to?”. My friend Kat and I have a ritual of describing our days precisely to each other: “I got up and had x for breakfast, went for a walk, did this, did that, worked on this, then I met you here! What about you?!” We love it, yet most people aren’t actually asking for this to-the-half-hour recap.

So when I am asked about “what I have been up to”, I rack my brains in panic. What did I even do yesterday, let alone during the weekend?! The thing is, the goal is not to give an accurate account of what I have done, but to reply with one interesting anecdote that will lead to more conversation. The question is actually “what do you want to talk about?”. In these small talk, initial stages of conversation, the question is ALWAYS really “what should we talk about?”.

Great go-to topics:

  • Books, Movies, tv, articles you’ve read [“I’m reading a book about…”, “I just saw that movie about…”]
  • Recent travels or mini adventures [“I just got back from…”, “I finally tried that restaurant that…”]
  • Upcoming travels [“I’m getting ready to go to…”]
  • Recent cultural events attended [“I went to that concert with…”]

When I’m on top of my game, as I spend the few minutes before meeting someone doing a mental check-in.. What have I been up to? What would be a positive topic to talk about? This is a great  not only for having a pleasant meeting with your friend, but also for interrupting the busy-ness of life to pause and reflect. 

So. What have you been up to lately?

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P.S. For more on the power of reflection, see the biggest lesson I learned this year.

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Socializing for Introverts, Jane Austen Heroines, and Sims

Socializing for Introverts, Jane Austen Heroines, and Sims

Everyone has a social needs bar.

Anyone who’s played The Sims will know that even those of us with the Loner trait have to fill our Social bars somehow:

Socializing for Introverts, Jane Austen Heroines, and Sims

Fulfilling Social Needs is different for Introverts and Extroverts

The other day I realised a funny thing. As I sealed and stamped an envelope containing a catch-up letter to a friend, I felt like a social need had been filled. There I was, sitting at my desk alone, with no one on Skype or the phone, no little icon indicating that a message had be received – the message wasn’t even in transit! Yet, I felt like I had communicated.

It can be a sad thing, having many long distance friends, but even though I haven’t seen some of them in months [or years], I don’t feel the urge to go on Skype. I spend enough time staring at screens, and too much of the conversation is faff: “wait you froze” – “I can’t see you, can you see me?” – “oh we must have gotten disconnected! silly internet!”. I can’t concentrate, and I’m admitting defeat.

Better than Skype [for me]

I know this is weird, but when I want to have a chat, I make like a Jane Austen heroine and write a letter by hand. I schedule a visit, and have marathon slumber party catch-up sessions with lots of giggles.

I’m curious – is this just me? Does letter-writing give you the same social satisfaction?

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P.S. more evidence that I was maybe born in the wrong time [this one’s about clothes]

Live Life Like a Video Game: Level Up!

Live Life Like a Video Game: Level Up!

Monkey and I like video games, and I like small steps. I especially like when the two align. In our attempts to be healthier, we have leapt to extremes: training for half marathons, booking big climbing trips, considering full-time juicing after watching Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. Lately though, we’ve fallen out of our prior habits of leading very active lives. Enter my digital minimalist guru Leo Babauta.

I read ZenHabits every day because Leo’s articles remind me to live consciously, and slowly enough to move forward at a steady pace. He likens building habits to leveling up in a video game, which resonates with me because it is both brilliant and fun.

Live Life Like a Video Game: Level Up!

I’m the kind of lady who describes her preferred aesthetic as “8-bit fairytale”, who dressed up as Ms Pac Man for her birthday party, who stores her files on an external hard drive made out of a Tetris game. I am Vanellope from Wreck-It Ralph (mixed with Lady from Lady and the Tramp). Why not treat exercise and health like a video game as well?

Live Life Like a Video Game: Level Up!

We’re most of the way through Level 1 now, which is just walking a little bit – we’ve been going for little walks in the morning, before the sun comes up here in ever-darkening Edinburgh – and eating a little bit less. At the end of the day we draw little stars on our calendar (gold for Monkey, silver for me) to track our progress. Leo calls it a Weight Loss challenge, but losing weight doesn’t motivate me as much as the idea of more energy and feeling stronger.

your-assignment

Want to level up with us? Send me a tweet or comment below and we can cheer each other on!

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P.S. 13 ways to life yourself out of an energy slump

tbt: Roller Coaster Tycoon

tbt: Roller Coaster Tycoon

This isn’t really a Throwback Thursday for me because I still play Roller Coaster Tycoon. A lot, recently.

I tell myself that it’s kind of entrepreneurial training. Kind of.

Mostly it’s just good old nostalgic fun that makes me really want to ride a roller coaster.

“I’ve already got an umbrella.”

“Lemonade 1 is really good value!”

“This park is really clean and tidy!”

…anyone?

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P.S. 5 Broadway Heroes and Heroines to Live By

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